


The Fete

by minerva_winchester



Series: The Principal Coulson and Single Dad Clint 'Verse [2]
Category: Hawkeye (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Darcy is intrigued by Natasha, F/F, First meeting for Natasha and Darcy, M/M, Natasha is fond of Darcy, Nick Fury weirds people out, Pre-Slash, Principal Phil Coulson, School Fete, Single Dad Clint Barton
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-07
Updated: 2015-02-07
Packaged: 2018-03-10 20:54:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3303155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minerva_winchester/pseuds/minerva_winchester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So I was thinking about getting them together in this but I couldn't figure out how to do it on school grounds without it being a little weird. I figured no matter how attracted to Clint, Coulson is he wouldn't make a scene on school grounds at the school fete by making out with a parent, especially seeing as he is the Principal. </p><p>Comments and Kudos would be amazing and thank you for reading!</p><p>Also thank you to long-live-mystrade over on Tumblr who has been incredible in listening to my ideas and helping me figure out what these characters are going to do as well as reading over my work before it gets published so THANK YOU!</p></blockquote>





	The Fete

Watching Kate’s dad make puppy dog eyes at her boss was equal parts cute and pathetic.

Darcy had noticed the way Principal Coulson had watched Mr Barton go after suspending her daughter and seriously how fast can you say conflict of interest.

Not that she blamed him.

Who came to see their daughters Principal wearing a sleeveless shirt?

Answer: someone with arms like Clint Barton.

Really they should be illegal. For the good of humanity.

And so other men are given the oppourtunity to procreate. Because seriously no one is competing with those arms.

Glancing around the oval Darcy took in the Fete. Barnes was holding the hand of one of his fourth graders who looked on the verge of tears clearing having lost her parents in the sea of people.

May was eyeing two 6th grade boys who looked like they were on the verge of throwing punches.

Tripp was seated at the face painting table with Sharon joking with the children as he painted butterflies and bleeding head wounds.

Not really wanting to analyse why the boys wanted to look like survivors of a particularly pathetic and unrealistic zombie apocalypse Darcy kept scanning the crowd of people gathered to raise money for the school until her eyes landed on a stunning redhead staring at He-Who-Pines with a look of revolted fascination.

Darcy understood that look on a molecular level.

It was the look of someone who couldn’t decide if puppy love was cute, funny or revolting.

Darcy made her way over, taking in the woman’s appearance as she went. She was clearly in very good shape which was only emphasised by her dark blue jeans and tight black singlet. Of course the knee high brown boots and matching leather jacket make her look far too dangerous to be at a primary school fete.

She doesn’t look over as Darcy draws up next to her, merely continuing to watch Mr Barton stare forlornly at Coulson with morbid fascination.

“There needs to be alcohol served at these things.”

The redhead raised an eyebrow at Darcy and wow seriously who can actually do that in real life?

“That would be rather irresponsible.”

Her tone was neutral but Darcy swore the other woman was teasing her. 

“Hey I’m not a parent, I’m only here to watch the puppy pine.”

“The puppy?”

Darcy nodded at Mr Barton.

“Only parent I’ve seen come out of the Principal’s office with their child having been suspended looking at Coulson like he hung the moon.”

A slight smile graced her lips and fuck if it wasn’t the hottest thing Darcy had seen this moon cycle.

“Subtly is not his strong suit.”

Wait.

“Do you know him? Tell me you know him.”

Darcy pressed her whole body against the gorgeous redhead forgetting for a moment that she didn’t actually know this woman. If this woman knew Barton then Darcy needed to get her wasted so she would spill. ‘Cause seriously this was too good of an opportunity to pass up. What had Clint said about Coulson? Was he planning on making a move? Did he need Darcy to set up an accidental meeting? She could do it. This past month had been the most entertaining in all the time she’d worked for Coulson which was only like a year but still they had been a boring 12 months pre-pining father.

“If I tell you his name will you tell me yours in return.”

Such a small price to pay in the face of continued amusement and an awkward and uncomfortable Coulson.

“Darcy Lewis.”

“Clint Barton.”

So she did know him. This was amazing.

“So does he pine when he’s off school grounds or is it a proximity thing?”

If Darcy hadn’t still been pressed against her she probably wouldn’t have noticed the shudder that ran through the woman’s body at Darcy’s comment which: interesting. The fact that she then glanced down at Darcy’s boobs like she needed a reminder that there was good in the world to ward of the bad memories well that was just perfect. Because seriously a woman who looked like that checking out Darcy well that was completely fine. More than fine. That was to be actively encouraged. Of course they were at a primary school fete and Darcy was already breaking the boundaries of these rich house wives propriety. Which eugh.

“His pining is most definitely not hindered by a lack of proximity.”

Darcy threw back her head and laughed loud, happy and a little bit manic, causing a few people to turn and stare.

Because seriously this conversation was getting better and better.

If Barton is pining over Coulson and Coulson is pining over Barton than this shit can escalate. More escalation = more entertainment.

Also maybe if Barton was around more than he might bring his sexy redheaded friend which, you know, would be great.

The woman was looking at her curiously and Darcy just couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“Last week Principal Coulson organised a future plan for Kate and asked me to call Mr Barton in to go over it with him but when I called it was Ms Bishops week so Coulson ended up spending nearly two hours going over this made up future plan with her and when she finally left he locked his door and I’m reasonably certain he cried.”

The woman stared at Darcy for a moment, blinked than threw her head back and laughed.

**

Phil was making conversation with literally every parent he passed. 

Every single one. 

There were literally hundreds.

Clint had positioned himself next to the petting zoo where Kate was making friends with what seemed to be every single animal in the fenced off area and also where he had a clear line of vision to Phil.

Watching both of them Clint allowed himself to consider what it would be like to be the primary recipient of Phil’s attention.

Caught up in his disturbingly domestic fantasy Clint just about fell over when he heard Natasha laugh. Looking around he saw her nearly fifty metres away talking to a busty brunette who Clint recognised as the receptionist, Miss Lewis.

Clint openly gaped at the joy evident on Natasha face, something that he normally only saw when they were alone and she allowed it.

“Do you know her?”

The question startled Clint as he realised that in his distraction he hadn’t noticed Phil move over to him until they were standing a very polite distance apart.

Phil was looking at Natasha with a bland smile. It was the smile Phil had given every other parent and Clint knew it shouldn’t bother him but he didn’t want to be like the other parents. He wanted Phil to smile at him like it was Clint and Phil not Mr Barton and Principal Coulson. 

Like he’d smiled at Clint when he’d picked Kate up on Wednesday. 

**

Kate hadn’t been waiting at their spot when Clint had arrived, late (shut up Susan), and Clint had panicked. A little.

Or a lot.

It’s all very subjective.

Walking (okay storming, just a little, he was entitled his daughter was missing) into the office Clint deflates in relief when he sees Kate perched on Miss Lewis, the receptionist’s, desk talking animatedly about her upcoming school camp.

Seeing him Kate lets out a squealed “DADDY!”

And then she’s running at him full speed so he has no choice but to pick her up and twirl her around.

(He knows one day she won’t be excited to see him so he intends to enjoy it while it lasts.)

“Are you ready to go kiddo or do you want to finish your story?”

“I wanna go home so we can have pizza!”

Smiling at his perfect little girl Clint waves good bye to Miss Lewis who waves back just as happy as Kate.

“Mr Barton.”

Phil came out of his office just as Clint was turning to leave surprise obvious but quickly turning into a smile. Like just seeing Clint had improved his day.

Clint couldn’t help smiling back a little bashfully.

“Hey Principal Coulson, what’s cooking- I mean… how are you?” 

Stupid!

What’s cooking good looking? Really?!

Jesus Christ this man fries his brain.

Nat is going to laugh herself stupid when she gets this out of him.

IT’S NOT EVEN A QUESTION THAT WORKS IN THIS CONTEXT!

Phil’s smile deepened at Clint’s slip and his eyes crinkled adorably. 

Before he could respond the door to the office, that Clint was standing in front of opened and a truly terrifying man walked into the room. 

Tall, dark and terrifying didn’t even cover it. Standing over six feet tall and dressed in all black the man was imposing.

Seriously all black. Black shirt, black jeans, black leather coat that swept behind him in the non-existent breeze, black eye patch.

Raking his eyes over Clint’s body in a way that reminded him way too much of Natasha the first time they met the man smirked.

Honest to god smirked.

“You have a really pleasant day boy.”

And with that he swept into Phil’s office, eliciting a giggle from Kate.

Seriously swept there is literally no other way to describe it.

Glancing towards the ceiling like he was praying for strength Phil smiled at Clint one last time and followed tall, dark and intimidating into his office, shutting the door behind him.

The only thing that made Clint feel better was the fact that Darcy looked as shocked as he felt.

**

“That’s Aunty Tasha, she’s daddy’s best friend but Grandaddy says she’s a-“

“Ok kiddo that’s enough.”

Laughing awkwardly Clint clamped his hand over his daughters mouth who had apparently snuck up behind them without either of them noticing.

Who had even taught her that?

Another laugh rang out across the oval signalling Nat’s entertainment at his situation.

He should’ve known.

He really, genuinely should have.

And now he’s been silent too long holding his hand over Kate’s mouth and smiling awkwardly at Phil who’s smiled had turned far more genuine and amused at Kate’s answer to his question.

Right Clint should’ve answered that question.

“Right that’s Natasha she’s been my best friend since-” she found me on the side of the road after my brother and mentor had beaten me and left me for dead and the circus had moved on without me “we were teenagers. She was a massive help in getting me custody.”

Phil’s smile turned a little sad at that and Clint suddenly had the feeling that Phil knew more about his situation than Clint had let on.

“It’s good to have friends like that.”

Clint found him removing his hand from Kate’s mouth and returning Phil’s smile at the Principal’s honest response.

“Yeah it is. People say it’s hard to stay friends with your ex’s but between Natasha and Bobbi I think I got very lucky.”

If Clint hadn’t been Hawkeye he would’ve missed the way Phil’s smile turned a bit forced before it faded into his bland Principal smile.

Shit. Shit. SHIT.

“But that was a long time ago and we’re very firmly just friends now.”

“Uh huh they are ‘cause Aunt Tasha looks after me when Daddy goes on dates and over summer we had a sleepover stay over ‘cause Daddy was having a sleepover with Greg and Aunt Tasha said it wasn’t a sleep over I could go to.”

Kate might have been pouting when she finished speaking, still angry that she hadn’t been invited to Clint’s ‘sleepover’ but Clint couldn’t hear it over the sound of his blood pounding in his ears. 

Well that’s one way to tell the guy you’re interested in that you like men.

Of course if the interest is not reciprocated Kate just told her Principal that her father leaves her with random women who are not her mother while he goes out and has sex with strangers.

Please god let it be option a.

“Well it’s always nice to hear that parents have reliable babysitters available for when they have a –uh- sleepover.”

He was laughing.

Not out loud but his eyes were laughing and god they were beautiful and goddamn it Clint get it together you are with your daughter and your daughters Principal at her school’s Fete.

Still the location didn’t stop him from being beautiful.

Just as Clint opened his mouth to say something an Asian woman stalked up to Phil and whispered something in his ear while looking at Clint with the blankest expression a human could ever not express. 

Seriously there was just nothing.

And then Phil was apologising and hurrying after the woman who turned out to be a very fast walker.

And Clint was left standing next to the animal petting enclosure watching Phil walk away from him just as he had maybe worked up the courage to possibly ask him on something that might, in some cultures, be construed as a date.

Like American culture.

Maybe.

Probably not.

Maybe he could ask Nat to do it for him.

No that was probably a bad idea.

Glancing over at where the woman in question was still standing with Miss Lewis blatantly watching Clint ogle another man’s butt.

It was a good butt.

But yeah, definitely a bad idea.

**

Seriously May now’s the time something happens that you definitely need Principal Coulson for and can’t deal with yourself.

You are a black belt in like 10 different martial arts disciplines and you have a Masters in primary teaching. What kind of situation could there possibly be that you couldn’t handle perfectly efficiently on your own?

“Who was that?”

“May, she teaches 6th grade.”

The woman nodded once with the kind of efficiency one would expect from an assassin when given their next target.

It is equal parts hot and terrifying.

“She’s probably Coulson’s closest friend.”

The woman sighed. Honest to god sighed like it was a hardship to let someone live.

“They are not going to get together on their own and I for one cannot handle a weekend like the last.”

“A) what happened last weekend and b) what are you planning and I can I help?”

The woman smiled at Darcy and it was a feral smile that promised all kinds of pain. 

Darcy was most definitely more turned on than terrified this time.

She should probably start seeing a therapist.

**Author's Note:**

> So I was thinking about getting them together in this but I couldn't figure out how to do it on school grounds without it being a little weird. I figured no matter how attracted to Clint, Coulson is he wouldn't make a scene on school grounds at the school fete by making out with a parent, especially seeing as he is the Principal. 
> 
> Comments and Kudos would be amazing and thank you for reading!
> 
> Also thank you to long-live-mystrade over on Tumblr who has been incredible in listening to my ideas and helping me figure out what these characters are going to do as well as reading over my work before it gets published so THANK YOU!


End file.
